The Art of Forgiving Yourself:

An Excerpt from “It’s Time! 21 Days to the Best Relationship with Yourself”

Below is an excerpt from my book where I discuss forgiveness. Most importantly learning how to forgive yourself. Many times, when I meet with new client, we find together that underneath all that stuff-there is guilt; a time when they judged themselves harshly,didn’t do their best or even a time when they believed a lie. I want to use this time to facilitate one of the most honest conversations with yourself and to help you work through forgiveness.

“Sometimes we look at forgiveness as a sign of weakness. There is no stronger moment in your life, no stronger character trait, no greater strength than forgiveness for yourself and others”.

There is true freedom in forgiveness. Forgiving yourself for anything that you have done is the greatest gift you can give yourself. Take a moment to go deeper and list those things, filling the damaged hole in your life. Take a moment to consider what occupies the places where you need to forgive yourself. Think about what you will replace in the open spaces where you once harbored hurt and pain after you forgive.”

1. A time when I judged myself harshly: _____________________

2. A time when I believed a lie that I told myself (For example: I’m not good enough, It’s not the right time to pursue this dream, etc.): ______________________

3. A time when I blamed myself for something beyond my control: ______________________

4. A time when I accepted someone hurting me: _____________________________________

5. A time when I settled for less than what I deserved: ________________________________

[su_label type=”info”]?[/su_label]Why did you allow yourself to be hurt?
[su_label type=”info”]?[/su_label]How can you learn to recognize these situations as they are happening?
[su_label type=”info”]?[/su_label]What steps do you need to take that will allow you to forgive yourself and let go of this hurt?

Now that you have looked at some of the ways you haven’t forgiven yourself,
use the following affirmation,
“Today, I am forever forgiving myself for ________________.”
(Fill in the blank. For example: For feeling as if you’re not good enough, for emotionally abusing yourself, for not doing your best, etc.) Use the forever forgiving affirmation helps you reinforce the release of the hurt and pain associated with forgiveness.
You can purchase a copy at  WWW.IAMDANIA.COM

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Dani A. Spikes

Dani A is a Professionally Certified Relationship Coach graduate from the University of Miami Coaching program with a background in Psychology and a concentration in Women's Studies. Impassioned about revolutionizing relationships through her award winning series and novel, Black Women Don't Deserve to be Loved, has contributed to the ongoing conversation of healthy self-loveand relationships. Proud author of, It's Time! 21 Days to the Best Relationship with Yourself: A Coaching Workbook to Self-Love, Success and Happiness. She regularly speaks both domestically and internationally regarding healthy interpersonal and intrapersonal relationship growth techniques.

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